Of Bored Warlords And Boring Primes
by Yuna Yami Mouto
Summary: Set sometime in s2ep3. Ultra Magnus and his team staying on Earth resulted in Megatron growing bored and abusing Shockwave's position to find entertainment. Imagine his relief when the potential for it is already on Earth. TFA slight slash


**Of Bored Warlords And Boring Primes**

**Summary: Set sometime in s2ep2. Ultra Magnus and his team staying on Earth resulted in Megatron growing bored and abusing Shockwave's position to find entertainment. Imagine his relief when the potential for it is already on Earth. TFA**

Spending a little over fifty stellar cycles as a disembodied head, even if he hadn't been awake for longer than a human year in all that time, served to numb one's processor with overwhelming boredom. Megatron would know. Being stuck in Sumdac's little lab with nothing to do but study the human equivalent of 'entertainment' had been torture and not just because he had been reduced to a helm. He wasn't even sure how he was alive or revived seeing as he didn't have a chassis, as such he didn't have chest plates to protect a sparkchamber, though he also didn't have a sparkchamber to house a spark. And without a spark, Cybertronians couldn't be alive, but there had Megatron been, only a head, reduced to passing his time by 'surfing' the 'Internet' or watching those horrible 'soap operas' and 'TV dramas'. He often wondered if Sumdac had indeed figured out Megatron was the enemy and had decided to subject him to the worst torture his fleshy species could come up with. Just that year with him was enough to make Megatron, who had never been xenophobic or bothered by organics, _hate_ an entire race and possibly all other organics by default. He was used to stupidity due to his Lieutenants and soldiers, but at least he could escape from them, either to be alone or for better company. He had not had such a mercy with Sumdac.

Unfortunately, regaining his body did little to rid him of his boredom. Aside from that brief fight with the Autobot Prime - he could barely even remember how many, if any, subordinates he had had with him as they had all fallen pathetically easily while the red and blue Autobot had at least put up a bit of a fight - and the following struggle for the AllSpark that had left them all in need of repairs, thus the need to call in Blackarachnia and listen to her complain or argue with Lugnut and Blitzwing, nothing interesting had happened. They were stuck in their new base in the human mines for healing, they set up said base and created a holding cell of sorts for his new pet, Professor Sumdac. Aside from the numerous failed assassination attempts from Starscream - who refused to stay dead after being offlined, though the AllSpark fragment in his forehelm might have something to do with that - that only served to aggravate him more until he told the seeker either to shut up and return to his duties as Second in Command of the Decepticons or go bother someone else, much to the seeker's astonishment, and Lugnut and Blitzwing's little outing to steal the ion transmitter from the Elite Guard ship, life was as bad as when he was just a head.

At least he had open communications with Strika and Shockwave now. He had calmed his army and had assured himself of Shockwave's position as Head of Intelligence on Cybertron - those Autobot fools suspected nothing. Shockwave was too good of a spy to let them discover him - which, once again, left him _bored_. He couldn't even go out for a flight or else the Elite Guard would know he was here, which would only impair his future plans and operations on this pathetic planet. He might have an Earth based alt mode now and Sumdac's signal dampeners worked perfectly, but the Fusion Cannon gave him away. For the first time since he had onlined with it integrated to his systems, he actually hated his powerful weapon. He was going to die of boredom because of it, after all. And he couldn't even spend his free time playing war-sims or other processor-engaging games with Strika and Shockwave, the most competent soldiers he had in his army. Not just because they were busy, but because he'd played with them millions of times before and he could count on both hands the times they had won. They simply didn't present a challenge anymore.

Strika was a brilliant strategist, but he was so used to her way of thinking that he could easily punch holes through her strategies. That's why they were such a fearsome combination when working together on an assault or defense. He was sad that Strika couldn't manage the same. The subtler of interferences, such as spy work, seemed to fly right over her helm. Then again, that's why she was his general and main strategist and not the Head of Intelligence and their spy network. That was Shockwave's position. And he, too, was brilliant, in many aspects, especially subterfuge, but open warfare confused him. He relied on logic and logic dictated the delicate work of a single well placed spy could bring down an empire faster than a war could and with far more devastating lingering effects. Well, unless the war is ended with total annihilation of an entire species, anyway. He _could_ make strategies involving armies and true, physical warfare, but he couldn't last all that long.

Starscream and Blitzwing had been promising opponents, once, but Starscream is a bit too cowardly and easily gives ground, arrogantly sure he can get it back, while Blitzwing ... Well, after meeting Blackarachnia and undergoing her experiments and tests to become a tripplechanger, he was never the same again. Icy could create a sound strategy, Angry makes rash moves and Random more often than not blows up his own pieces if he plays a war-sim these days. Megatron had once sat down Sumdac and tried to play the human strategy game, 'chess', only to find it far too boring since it was so _easy_.

He had also challenged Blackarachnia to a game of war-sims and she had managed to hold up for a little while before she started losing and grumbling how it wasn't _her_ specialty, but 'that dork's'. Frowning, Megatron had asked her what she meant and she seemed all too happy to recount to him about her days as an Autobot Academy Cadet and she told him of a bot with a perfect score in all sorts of simulations, not just war-sims. Intrigued, Megatron had asked for more but she only rolled her four optics and went back to her research and experiments on purging her organic half. Normally, such insolence would not be tolerated, but Megatron was now far too curious about this bot. He was bored. He was bored right out of his processor and he _desperately_ needed some sort of entertainment. He had been given an opportunity and all he had to do to take it was to find out which bot it was she was talking about.

He turned on the comm station and pinged Shockwave. As soon as his spy answered the call, Megatron relied his order. "Shockwave, find me the best strategist the Autobot Academy has ever produced."

00000

Meanwhile, at the Autobot base, Sentinel and Jazz had come along with the Earth bound Autobots to inspect their base of operations and see what they were up to in their free time when not defending the local lifeforms or searching for the AllSpark fragments. Sari and Bumblebee completely ignored their presence, far too interested in their video games to care about the stiffs from the Elite Guard though Jazz was a cool bot. Prowl actually engaged Jazz in a deep, hushed conversation about their ninja training and the two seemed to be having a blast. Ratchet had gone off to his corner to tinker with what medical tools he had available to him or was creating new ones from scrap with the limited technology available to him and Bulkhead had wandered over to his little 'art station' so he can prepare more pieces for his next gallery show. Finding that none of them would pay attention to him and feeling the old medic might even flip him off, Sentinel turned to the one bot he knew _couldn't_ ignore him, not at all surprised what he saw.

"Still as boring as you used to be, Optimus old buddy? I thought you'd learned by now that nobot cares about that archives and history slag."

Said red, blue and silver Prime looked up from an old datapad, indeed containing historical chronicles from the Great War to reset his optics at his 'old friend', only to find his team and Sari were also staring at him. He shifted a bit and out down the pad, his attention on the big-chinned Prime. "You already know my stance on importance of history, Sentinel. Washing out of the Academy didn't change my mind."

Sentinel snorted, crossing his servos over his chassis. "You know, there's a _reason_ no one ever invited you to parties back in bootcamp or the Academy. And this is exactly it. You're _boring_. Slag, I think you could bore a scraplet into not eating you. It wouldn't want someone so plain and boring to contaminate its systems, the little monsters that they are. Who _reads_ anymore, anyway? You can just download the information you want in a couple of kliks at most. Why waste all that precious time that you could be spending doing something else? Something _fun_."

"I find that reading _is_ fun," Optimus defended with an offended tone to his voice, only to falter when Sentinel, Bumblebee and Sari all scuffed.

"No offense, Bossbot, but _no_ one thinks reading is fun. It's too much like _studying_! Why would you read about something when there are probably holovids of it somewhere or at least audio recordings?" Bumblebee said, pausing the game so he can properly look over to the Prime seated in the corner with his datapads. "Not even _nerds_ think reading is fun. It's like work! No one reads for fun."

"Bumblebee," Ratchet hissed when he realized where the yellow minibot could go with this when he saw Optimus go rigid right up to his audio finials and Sentinel point at Bumblebee in a distinctly "See! Even this _glitch_ understands!" manner. But the speedster was on a roll and there was no stopping him now, even as Optimus' slumped a little more with each word that left his vocalizer.

"I can't believe I'm actually saying this, Bossbot, but I agree with Sentinel on this. You're so _boring_. I mean, even the humans think so. The only fun thing about you is how big you are compared to the rest of us, not counting Bulkhead, and when you say 'Roll out', but everything else about you is so boring and uptight that it could bring a normal bot to _tears_. I mean, if you started talking about history and those datapads that you always read when you're not on patrol, I bet people would run away because it's so processor-numbing _boring_. Is there anything more boring than reading? Reading history datapads!"

Sari looked uncomfortable as she tried to smile reassuringly at the slumping firetruck. "I think Bumblebee is just saying that not everyone finds your interests quite as interesting, Optimus. Everyone has different tastes. Like Prowl and watching nature and Bulkhead and his art."

"Yeah, but at least Prowl is _watching_ nature instead of _reading_ about it. That would be almost as boring as history pads!" Bumblebee broke in again, grinning from ear to ear and showing no signs of stopping or that he noticed how gloomy Optimus' optics had turned. "And Bulkhead's art is actually fun to make. Right, buddy?"

"Y-yeah, I guess it's really fun," the big green bot replied a little uncertainly, not really sure if he wanted to be a part of this conversation or not. He was actually a lot more perceptive than people gave him credit for and he saw how uncomfortable Optimus looked the longer the conversation continued. "I mean, I enjoy doing it and that's what really matters in the end."

"But it's _fun_! Definitely more fun than _reading_ about art, right?" Hesitantly, Bulkhead nodded, unable to lie. He personally preferred other reading materials, specifically about space bridges, but he didn't dare bring it up when he was hearing Bumblebee's opinion on Prime's reading choices. "Reading is just so boring! No excitement at all! I swear you act older than Ultra Magnus, Bossbot!"

"Readin' is cool," Jazz tried to intervene but Sentinel was louder.

"Exactly!" The blue and orange, big-chinned Prime exclaimed triumphantly. "Optimus here had to be dragged out of his room or the Hall of Records back on Cybertron before rust could take his gears. He acts older than even Alpha Trion and that senile old fool is _ancient_ and speaks nonsense half the time!"

"Alpha Trion is neither senile nor a fool and he _doesn't_ speak nonsense. You're practically a sparkling to him, Sentinel. He's _exasperated_ by you but is too polite - and refuses to fall down to your level - to tell it to your face so he speaks in older or southern dialects, like Kaonite or Tarnian or that one time even Vosian when you dared bring energon goodies into the Archives," Optimus defended his quasi-mentor, but that only got him exasperate huffs.

"See what I mean? Nobot even _liked_ him because he was always such a goodie-goodie, always studying and reading and doing pointless research. Sometimes I don't even know why anyone ever bothered to _talk_ to him. He once bored one of our instructors to _sleep_." The slightly bigger Prime turned on the Academy washout, smugness and superiority tinging his field as he smirked at the repair bot. "You're not an exciting or particularly interesting mech, Optimus. Everyone agrees."

Optimus looked around the room at his team and found them all frowning, even Bumblebee, but no one said a word to dispute Sentinel's claims. A heavy feeling settled in his spark when the only response his 'friends' had was Bulkhead's uneasy shuffling and Ratchet grumbling about 'pompous Elite Guard slaggers'. Not even Sari came to his defense. Then again, she was just a child and didn't like her lessons with her Tutorbot very much while she still had them. He sighed and heaved himself to his pedes, taking his small stack of datapads with him. He didn't say a word or look at anyone as he walked out of the room, heading for his berthchamber and 'locking' the door behind him.

Everyone watched him go with varying expressions, Ratchet and Bulkhead with worry, Prowl with unease for not standing up for him, Sari with guilt and Bumblebee still appeared clueless while Jazz just shook his helm in pity. Sentinel seemed rather satisfied with himself.

Ratchet snatched up whatever it was he had been working on and stomped out of the room. "Nice going there," was all he growled out at Bumblebee, who only now realized how Optimus might have taken his teasing and flinched. Bulkhead shuffled out with his unfinished work so no one could start criticizing his hobby and Prowl just walked out, not giving anything away. Jazz followed after him with a concerned glance at the 'locked' door as they passed it, pausing before continuing after his fellow cyberninja. It was not his place to get involved. Sentinel, once again bored, simply went back to the Steelhaven, leaving Bumblebee and Sari to stew in their guilt at having hurt their Bossbot's feelings with their careless words or lack of support.

00000

Not a day later, the Autobots, both space bridge repair bots and the three Elite Guard mechs, found themselves knocked out and delivered into the Decepticon's new underground base, cuffed in their own stasis cuffs and put behind a powerful forcefield. Well, Ultra Magnus, Sentinel Prime, Jazz Minor, Medical Officer Ratchet, Prowl, Bumblebee and Bulkhead found themselves locked in their own stasis cuffs and behind a powerful forcefield. Sari was put in the same holding cell as her father, stripped of her AllSpark Key so she couldn't escape, but it was Optimus Prime that found himself in the strangest location upon booting up. He was not behind the forcefield with his fellow Autobots, but was rather sitting in a makeshift chair at a makeshift table with a can of delicious smelling oil in front of him. His vision and processor were blurry as he tried to figure out what had happened.

Ultra Magnus still wouldn't believe him there were Decepticons on Earth and Sentinel had been subtly threatening or blackmailing him into lying in front of the Council so as not to 'cause unnecessary panic' over 'insecure data' when Jazz, who had been with his team, reported a 'giant metalloid spider' to be attacking them with the help of 'human aircrafts' which Prowl then reported to Optimus to actually be Starscream, who should be dead since Megatron had offlined him in front of all of their optics for his betrayal and assassination attempt, Blitzwing and Lugnut and the three truck mechs had rushed off to help them as soon as they could. But Starscream had gotten a good shot at Ultra Magnus before the blue and white mech could use his hammer to deal with the Decepticons and then Lugnut used POKE and it all went downhill from there. The last thing Optimus remembered before falling into stasis was a familiar sting and transfer of venom before huge pincer-like servos picked him up and he knew no more.

Now that he could think and see clearly, it was easy to deduce that they were in the Decepticon's new base, wherever that might be. The giant carved Decepticon insignia on the opposite wall was kind of a dead giveaway. From what he could see of his fellow Autobots, they didn't seem to be too bad off, though some of them still had ice clinging to parts of their plating. Still, they were all alive and in one piece and slowly coming online, optics struggling to power up so they can take in their surroundings.

"Ah, you're finally awake," a hauntingly familiar, deep, rumbling voice that sent shivers down his spinal strut came from the other side of the table and Optimus looked up, surprised he hadn't noticed _Megatron_ of all bots sitting across from him immediately, watching him with a curious light in his red optics, seemingly studying him. He wasn't the only one present. The three other Decepticons and, of course, Blackarachnia were all there as well, standing a little ways away, closer to the holding unit Optimus now saw contained Professor Isaac Sumdac and a worried looking, Key-less Sari. They also seemed unharmed, so a small part of Optimus relaxed in the knowledge that everyone was alive and healthy, no matter for how much longer. "I've been getting a bit impatient, Optimus Prime."

"You actually remembered my name?" The incredulous bot in question asked as the other Autobots all finally got themselves together, frowning when they noticed their situation and Optimus'.

"What is the meaning of this, Megatron? Release us at once!" Ultra Magnus said in his best commanding, authoritative tone, but Megatron's optics never left the surprised young Prime in front of him. Said Prime did his best not to squirm as he narrowed his own optics and glared at the warlord. Gray dermas twitched in amusement but Megatron held back his smirk for the time being.

"I'm afraid I can't do that, Magnus, for you see, I am very,very _bored_ these days," the gray war mech said with a mocking sigh. "There is little to sufficiently entertain me, so I asked of my troops to find me some entertainment. Blackarachnia gave me an idea, an idea I had Shockwave look further into until I was certain I'd find some quality amusement and imagine my delight when I learned it's _already_ here on Earth!"

"So you're going to torture and interrogate us for your own sick amusement?" Sentinel challenged and Optimus - who surprisingly enough _wasn't_ in stasis cuffs - and Blackarachnia facepalmed at the exact same time, groans escaping their vocalizers while Jazz, Ratchet and Ultra Magnus looked at him as though he were insane. The other three Deceoticon mechs sneered, growled or snarled at him while Megatron just arched an optic bridge at him.

"While I _could_ do that, I find it I have much better ways of finding entertainment." At this, he did smirk at Optimus, his sharp fangs showing a little as he regarded the wary Prime. "I've been itching for a game for far too long."

"So you will play mind games with us, one at a time, until you've had your fun and then offline us? That is low, even for you, Megatron."

But the tyrant just rolled his optics and sighed in exasperation. "I couldn't give a scraplet's aft for you lot, but the way I see it, you're my insurance for entertainment." And as the Elite Guard, the humans and the space bridge repair bots _gawked_ at the dismissal of the _Autobot Supreme Commander_ as though he were a piece of scrap in Megatron's way, said mech turned back his full attention to the red and blue mech in front of him. "I only care for _Optimus Prime_ here. Taking you only ensured there'd be no interruption and that Optimus here will agree to play."

"All of this, just because you wanted to mess with an _Autobot_?!" Starscream screeched in indignation, but shut up when Megatron aimed perfectly at his forehelm with his Fusion Cannon without looking away from the Autobot in question. Optimus frowned even deeper, outright glaring in suspicion at the Decepticon leader.

"And if I were to refuse?"

Megatron shrugged, redirecting his cannon at Ultra Magnus spark. "Then I'll just have to kill your little fellow Autobots until you agree. From what I understand, you're a kind and compassionate bot so surely their safety must be of _some_ importance to you. Even that big-chinned fool that would have gotten you all killed by now if these were any other circumstances. If you do not indulge me, you will soon find yourself a lone Autobot prisoner and will have to give in _eventually_. What would be the point by then? Either way you choose, I'll get some entertainment and sate my curiosity. All you have to do to ensure that they live and walk out of here as free bots, young Optimus, is to entertain me."

"Oh boy, we are _so_ dead," Bumblebee said under his intake but Optimus, battle protocols active in the presence of so many enemies and hyper aware of his surroundings, still heard him, frowning. He hated to admit it, but Bumblebee just might be right. While the words had hurt yesterday, he knew them to be the truth. The only bot who had ever had any interest in what he might say or ask had always been _only_ Alpha Trion and no one else. Not even the old mech's archivist had shown much care for the datapads they were sorting, much to Trion's immense displeasure. Optimus wasn't sure he could 'sufficiently entertain' Megatron to ensure his friend's lives and freedom.

"What kind of entertainment are we talking about?"

"Are you agreeing?" Megatron countered his question with one of his own, arching a challenging optic ridge at him.

"Not until you tell me what you're expecting of me. I won't go into this blind. I may be young and naive, but I'm not a fool." Optimus even crossed his servos to emphasis his defiance, hoping this won't get his friends killed, but Megatron only smirked in satisfaction. He reached to the center of the table, where a small holograph projector rested, and pressed a fee buttons before the device lit up and a 3D image floated above the table. Optimus' optics flashed with both understanding and confusion as he recognized a war-sim game, shooting Megatron a perplexed look around the simulation. The warlord just smirked.

"I have found myself lacking a worthy opponent in this field for quite some time, but Shockwave assures me you know how to play. All you need to do to free your comrades, Optimus Prime, is present me with a challenging game and I will let you all walk out of here unharmed."

"That's it?" Optimus couldn't help but ask because he couldn't believe it could possibly be so _easy_. When Megatron just nodded with that same self-satisfied smirk in place, something in Optimus ... shifted and he grinned at the warframe in front of him, unsettling his team and the Decepticons while Blackarachnia's and Sentinel's optics got as wide as dinner plates when they recognized the long lost expression. Ultra Magnus might have even pitied his counterpart if he wasn't worrying about the interest this was bound to garner in the warframe and about just _how_ Megatron could have come by this information in the first place. "Then what are we waiting for? Start the simulation!"

Megatron only smirked wider, mistakenly thinking Optimus was underestimating him as he chose a setting he knew quite well, interested in how the Autobot will handle it while said Autobots friends were _gawking_ at the confidence they had never seen in the humble bot before. Optimus looked at the configuration that appeared before him, the numbers, the 'default' positioning of the forces he had and although it was a space battle with no terrain, he immediately recognized it. It was one of the Decepticon's more notable victories since Autobot strategists _still_ had no idea how they could have punched through the enemy lines with the resources they had at hand at that time. The resources _Optimus_ had at hand right now. When this battle had taken place, it had been over in under a decacycle and that was even with constant backup coming for the Autobots.

Oh, this was going to be easier than he thought.

Megatron watched the Prime as he started rearranging his ships, intense concentration in his optics and something a lot like gleeful excitement in his field, as though he already _knew_ how to deal with the challenge Megatron had presented before him. Unlikely. This particular victory, though smaller in scale of things, had been a combined contribution of Strika, Shockwave, Starscream, Scrash and Megatron himself, which is why it, to this day, remains an unbeaten strategy. And yet he found himself wondering what the Autobot would come up with and how well it will fair against the plan of battle five of the Decepticons' best strategists had out together.

Two breems later, Optimus had made the rearrangements he wanted and they started the simulation, changing the routes and positions and formations of their little holographic ships as the the battle waged on. At first, it looked like Megatron was winning, but then Optimus suddenly smiled this most dazzling grin anyone had seen from him as he moved _one_ ship and _punched through the Decepticon frontline_ and continued _going deeper_. Megatron stared, disbelieving as he watched the ship deploy man-less spacecrafts to go undetected by ship defense scanners and open a bigger path and two more similar ships followed after it. Megatron turned the attention of the nearest ships to those crafts, only to find that their engines had been shot and they couldn't move. He deployed individual soldiers, the Decepticins' greatest advantage over Autobots being that they can fight in space _without_ the need of space shifts, only for a command ship to follow after the other three and practically mow over the soldiers. Without the ability to choose which individual soldiers he had deployed or activating any special weaponry or abilities they might have had had they been real, they were defenseless. The Decepticon line broke as more ships made it through the opening and continuing the simulation would only end in his defeat. Judging from Optimus' expression as he moved another ship into a different position to chip yet _another_ weakness in the formation, the Prime knew it, too.

"Oh, I'm sorry," the red, blue and silver Autobot said, not sounding in the least bit sincere, when he noticed Megatron staring at him. The simulation had lasted only fifteen Earth minutes but the simulation chronometer said that the battle 'lasted' the same amount of time, down to a joor, as the original battle the simulation was modeled after. "But did you expect to _win_?"

The Autobots mostly had their jaws on the floor because this was _nothing _like the Optimus they were used to. The Decepticons were gawking, too, as _this _was the first time any of them had seen this particular strategy defeated, and so easily, too. It was way beyond unsettling for them.

"So it _is_ true, then," Megatron said more to himself as he saved the simulation results and sent a ping to Shockwave and Strika to observe from the comm station as it activated. Thankfully, Shockwave didn't seem busy in his spy mission and Strika seemed interested in watching this match after quickly reviewing the results of the last sim. "You _are_ the best war-sim player your Academy produced. Then the other things I've learned about you must be true, too." He scrapped the current simulation and brought up another one, this one the Battle of Luna 2. "Again."

"And what else, exactly, did you learn?" The Prime asked distractedly, already recalling the statistical analyses about this battle and doing his own calculations and recalibration before he started moving the troops, most of which were ground troops that had to watch out for the Decepticons, who were mostly fliers and had aerial superiority. This was a victory that was later followed by a defeat because an Omega Sentinel had been sent to provide support. The Omega Sentinel didn't make it but the ultimate victory fell to the Autobots, as did Luna 2. The Autobot frontline had been strong, but their rear had been especially vulnerable, so Optimus immediately fixed that before focusing on the weaknesses on the Decepticon front and its weak left wing. He did some more maneuvering before starting the simulation. "I thought you wanted to play, not to chat, 'Buckethead'."

Megatron twitched while Blitzwing tried to hold back the cackling of his Random persona while Starscream snickered with Blackarachnia behind their raised hands. "So it is accurate that you were a pupil of Alpha Trion in the Archives. There's no else you'd learn of that dreadful mockery of a childish insult than from him. He's the only bot insolent and brave enough to keep using it." Optimus shot a look at Ultra Magnus when he swore he heard him mutter something along the lines of "Damn straight," which didn't surprise him. Alpha Trion used to oppose most decisions that the Elite Guard wanted to enforce. Optimus had even read somewhere that the old mech had helped Megatron in taking down and dismantling the functionist government regime back before the Decepticons became violent. "And I said to _entertain_ me, to present me a challenge. Surely the favorite protégé of the Grand Archivist can do both?"

"You can distract me with talk but I'll still win," the Prime said with a pointed look to the changes in formation Megatron was making and responding almost immediately, as though he had been _expecting_ that move in response to his own strategy. The fliers were now hammering down on the attacking units on the Decepticons' left flank, leaving very little aerial support for the front lines and Optimus brought in the ships. The numbers in the center suddenly started dropping. "I was Trion's favorite?"

"So intelligence tells me," Megatron grumbled as he did calculations and saw that whatever response he gave, the line will be broken. The only response he _could_ give were the network of enegex explosives, but that will be a pretty hollow victory as a good portion of his own troops will suffer. And judging by the look his opponent was giving him, Optimus knew it, too, which only delighted and intrigued him more. It has truly been too long since he'd had a potentially worthy opponent, but he'll be testing that after he stops using these matrices of past battles and starts actually actively participating himself. He has at the very least fifty one stellar cycles of boredom to make up for. "Apparently he's given you more leeway and wider access than he has to any of his other protégés and assistants and is still 'grumpy'," he even threw in a roll of his optics and those air quotes with his fingers that humans seemed so fond of. "About your absence from Cybertron. I guess I can see why. It's so hard to find intelligent company these days."

"But that doesn't make any sense!" Exclaimed the Autobot, gawking, though not faltering in the game in the least. "I'm not his protégé! I never was! I just hung out a lot at the Hall of Records and occasionally asked him about things or discussed interesting records! I was an Academy bot, meant for the military, not a scholar!"

"Not for a lack of trying on Trion's part," Ultra Magnus quiped, earning him some gawking from his two Primes and the rest of the Autobots. "I think he wanted to take you on as his apprentice and leave you the Archives and his Council position, too, but I believed the position of Magnus would be more to your benefit."

"Shows how right you were."

"Well, you're not wrong." Sentinel and Blackarachnia, respectively, said at the exact same time and the femme turned her four optics to glare at her former friend while Sentinel tried to return it only to shriek like a little girl when he saw what she was and recoiled in disgust. Blackarachnia hissed at him and stalked forward with the obvious intention of introducing him to her venom for the second time, possibly with an overdose this time, had Optimus not called out.

"Elita, no!" The black femme froze and sent a half incredulous, half angry look in the direction of the Prime who had just jumped out of his chair and made as if to stop her himself if his words didn't but wasn't touching her, not out of fear or disgust, but out of hesitance to upset her. "Sorry. I meant Blackarachnia. You know how Sentinel can be-"

"A waste of a perfectly good processor? A crankshaft? A good for nothing insensitive slagger who never knew how to appreciate what he had while he could? Yep, he is and he always will be which is _why_ he _deserves_ to have his aft handed to him so he can learn a _lesson_ for once in his miserable existence."

"Well, yes, I won't argue with that-"

"Hey! Just whose side are you on!?" The offended Prime exclaimed and Optimus shot him a deadpan look.

"Blackarachnia's," he said before turning back to said femme, who was both shocked and smug to have his support. "None the less, _Megatron_," and here he shot the warlord in question a sharp glare, who only grinned roguishly at him. Optimus rolled his optics in exasperation. "Promised me they'll go unharmed if I go along with his little games, so Sentinel's lesson will have to wait until we get out of this cave or whatever. After that, as far as I care, you can kick his tin can all the way back to Archa 7. Deal?"

Blackarachnia huffed and crossed her servos over her chassis. "I guess I don't have much of a choice. Though don't think that this," she gestured offhandedly between them to make her point. "Means you're forgiven."

"Wouldn't dream of it." He extended a servo for her to shake with a smile and she just shot him an exasperated look but took it all the same, grumbling about dorks all the while. Optimus just grinned through it all.

"Cadet Elita One? Is that really you?" Ultra Magnus asked, just now registering what name Optimus had first called out and staring at his long lost cadet in incredulousness. Blackarachnia just rolled all of her optics and rounded on him, her servos on her hips.

"No, if you didn't get the memo, I am _not_ your little cadet! I'm Blackarachnia of the Decepticons and you better remember it."

"It would seem I might even get the obscured details of this ... Archa 7 Incident," Megatron commented with a hum and it was Optimus who whirled around to glare at a much larger mech.

"Not a chance or you'll find yourself _very_ bored again _very_ soon." Megatron arched an optic ridge at the Prime before gesturing at the empty seat in front of him.

"I'm getting bored right now."

The firetruck scuffed but returned to his seat, checking on the progress of the simulation since neither of them had bothered to pause it. "What are you, a sparkling?" He asked as he inspected the virtual battlefield. There were casualties on both sides but Optimus was glad to see that on his side it wasn't as devastating as it had been in the original battle. Megatron's forces were holding up as any warframe would, no surprise there, but they were losing ground. Megatron now really had no other choice than to either sacrifice this battalion or lose the critical strategic position he currently held, even if the Omega Sentinel that will come as backup for the Autobots will devastate his forces.

"No, but I _am_ a very powerful warlord who has been bored out of his processor for over fifty stellar cycles and that was _after_ not having sufficient, satisfying entertainment since I broke away from the main army in search of the AllSpark." The warlord said that even as he paused the simulation, saved its results and called up another one, this one a space battle, completely blank, meant for them to create their own strategies from scrap as a privacy screen appeared so they couldn't see each other's moves before the simulation 'officially' starts, never mind the spies and Intelligence Officers and Agents offered to them already to sabotage or infiltrate enemy lines for intel. It would seem Megatron was getting serious.

Optimus hesitated, glancing back at his Commanding Officer, wondering if he should actually continue participating. Ultra Magnus already knew all his scores from the Academy, but this felt a little too much like showing off. Optimus wasn't a bot who did everything for bragging rights. That was Sentinel through and through. But could he actually stop now? It was only now getting interesting. He looked back at the standard options offered to him. Five hundred soldiers, ten aircrafts, twenty drones, one command ship, five Intelligence Agents and seven Black Ops. Energon rations for two decacycles of constant battle and enough weaponry and ammunition to cover each bot three times over in that period of time. Enough bombs to make any Wrecker squee in joy and a self destruct sequence for the command ship. No frame or special mods specifications. This wasn't Autobots versus Decepticons, hell it was green against orange! They start off on equal footing. They'll have to build their armies from nothing. This was the most difficult level of war-sims. Optimus had only ever run a simulation like this three times before and the last one had been five hundred stellar cycles before Archa 7. And to top it all off, he was to play against the Lord of the Decepticons himself, a warframe therefor a better strategist than your average Autobot just because he was onlined for war and meant to wage it in the best and most efficient way possible. It didn't really matter if he _won_ this game, he just had to entertain him.

But, to his own surprise, Optimus _wanted_ to win. It, too, had been far too long since the last time he had a decent opponent in war-sims. The Academy simulators and computers stuck to the original play out as much as it was possible while still making 'differences', but to any bot who read about those original play outs it was obvious that the variations were minuscule at best. Optimus had studied the history of the Great War almost religiously and knew almost every battle by spark. He knew the strategies used by both sides and refused to lose to a machine that didn't have a spark or true sentience. His instructors didn't give him much of a challenge, either, much for the same reason. They expected a rookie with rash moves and constant mistakes. They'd never taken him seriously, even when he beat them all, one by one, with extremely enviably low casualties of his own 'forces'. He'd won every award in the Academy, in every field, but somehow strategy had never been officially listed as a strong point, much to his annoyance. No one ever took him as a serious opponent, even after he won several matches against some of the best Autobot generals from the Great War and, that one private time, Ultra Magnus himself. Ultra Magnus was perhaps the only one who acknowledged this skill of his and yet it had never really been given the attention he would have needed to further develop. He had to do it on his own, studying countless records from any and all wars, skirmishes or conflicts Cybertron has ever had in its long history.

And yet here was _Megatron_ of all people, taking him seriously as no one has ever before, looking at him with a cross between challenging, curious and _respectful_. Megatron, the bot who had very nearly conquered Cybertron despite the AllSpark, the space bridges and the fleet of Omega Sentinels, respected Optimus' strategic thinking enough to _kidnap_ his team and the Elite Guard and _not_ kill his long time enemy because he _wanted to see the proof with his own optics_. How could Optimus disappoint?

With that thought firmly in processor, Optimus smiled to himself and started rearranging his troops and provisions, tightening security to keep a lookout for the spies that he had no doubt Megatron would employ. After all, Optimus' Academy records weren't exactly public. It would seem the Elite Guard had a security problem. But he didn't focus on that. He was much too invested in making this war-sim the hardest of Megatron's life, shutting down all unnecessary subconscious cognitive protocols that would distract him. The first move was the hardest and the first formation the most important. If you have a strong base, you can attack or defend much more easily than if that first formation is sloppy and ill constructed. Optimus had seen the human game of chess. It did not compare, could not compare, to war-sims.

Megatron, busy as he was with his own arrangement of troops, still had the presence of mind to watch Optimus occasionally, seeing a whole new side of the Autobot. He smiled to himself, finding the smaller mech kind of ... cute as he seemed to immerse himself completely into the game, forgetting all about his friends and Commanding Officer in the holding cell relatively nearby. Blackarachnia seemed to be holding _their_ attention on herself well enough, preventing the Autobots from distracting his companion. Megatron had to admit that he already found Optimus far batter company than he'd had in several hundred stellar cycles. The bot was obviously intelligent and very well educated. Shockwave had, as always, done his job perfectly well when he had found this Autobot for Megatron's entertainment. He didn't personally know what kind of mech the little Prime was, but he had always looked subdued unless in the throes of battle. Now, there was a different kind of feeling to him. Megatron greatly appreciated the change. The little Autobot was more fun than he'd had in ages.

"So," Optimus was the first to start the conversation when they both powered down the privacy screen to view the starting formations the other had constructed so they could make the final adjustment before starting the sim. "You said something about finding out some information about me? What's that about and why would you care?"

"Your friend Blackarachnia over there commented to me yesterday about how war-sims were not her specialty, but, and I quote, 'that dork's' and it drew my interest." He watched as Optimus sent a frown at the spider femme, but she just gave him a rude gesture that had him rolling his optics before turning back to the warlord, who was now smirking at the Prime. Optimus rolled his optics at him, too, made one final adjustment and waiting for Megatron to finish his own. "I had Shockwave research on who is the best strategist your little Academy has ever produced and, lo and behold, I find out it's _you_, amongst _other_ interesting things."

"I'm not a particularly interesting bot, Megatron," the younger argued even as he watched the Decepticon make some final changes and then starting the war-sim, the two already actively changing course of particular ships, adding ammunition here or retracting troops there, almost dancing around each other's forces on the holographic battlefield.

"_I_ _highly_ _disagree_. Not every bot has an absolutely perfect score in the Academy, after all." This time, it was only Ultra Magnus, Blackarachnia and Sentinel that weren't gaping. Even _Optimus_ was gaping, though Megatron couldn't tell if it was from the acknowledgement or the praise. Not that it mattered. "I've seen your files. You had perfect grades on every test, in every subject, after every exercise. Shockwave even tells me that you had the best score on that little simulated battle against me. Not surprising, once one thinks about it. I've seen you fight, I've felt the sting of your blows. Though you could use some more training, you're a far better fighter than any Autobot I've faced so far. That might have something to do with you actually being capable of _thinking_ instead of just rushing in blindly and believing in 'Autobot superiority'." He saw the little yellow speedster flinch at that and smirked, recalling what had actually prevented Starscream from either killing him with his Nullrays or monologuing him to death. The seeker didn't do subtle. "Quite frankly, you intrigue me, Optimus Prime. A worthy Magnus candidate that actually has the approval of the most shrewed mech on Cybertron, a well educated and highly intelligent individual with the fighting skills and bravery to match and a deeply rooted kindness and compassion that leaves me a bit befuddled ... How can there be so much spark in such a little chassis? And, apparently, you are a strategic genius," he waved his black servo to indicate the war-sim playing out before them, the first clash between their virtual armies. "You are _far_ from uninteresting. I envy Ultra Magnus for snatching you up. Might you be interested in a badge change?"

"As ... flattering as this is, Megatron," the younger mech managed to get out without stuttering, staring with wide optics at the gray mech, unable to believe what his processor was assuring him _wasn't_ a dream. "I'm not defecting."

"And loyal to booth. Shame," the Decepticon shook his helm, frowned at the simulated battlefield and changed course of a troop of ships. Optimus countered him not a klik later, their servos moving around a lot more than previously so, ignoring the gawking mecha around them. "I always knew you Autobots didn't know how to appreciate real talent, but to waste someone like you on a glitched _space bridge repair crew_ ... Now that's just wrong."

"Well, it would seem Primus had a hand in this, since we found the AllSpark and I had to throw you out of the airlock to prevent you from getting it," the Prime replied, moving a squadron to the left wing from the right, seemingly weakening said wing and Megatron went for it like a predator would for the wounded prey's jugular. Only it turned out to be a trap as Optimus deployed a third of his explosives reserves and destroyed every enemy ship that had went to attack the left wing. He lost his own ships there, but they had been the ones he had used to empty out all of their ammunition and evacuated them of mecha and resources. Not all escape shuttles avoided the tidal wave of explosions. He lost half of the crew of those ships.

"Oh? And do you believe in Primus or is this just an empty statement?" The older mech asked with a begrudging respect for the move that had cost him plenty of soldiers and their _own_ explosives they had carried. Optimus had the favor of the battle.

Optimus grinned at him as he rearranged his ships into a new formation. "I take it we have time to find out."

00000

It took a _very_ long time for Megatron to find out that Optimus wasn't only interested in the history of the Great War or just military history of Cybertron in general. Oh, no. The little mech had read all sorts of datapads on _all_ topics while he had had access to the Hall of Records and Alpha Trion himself and was, indeed, _wonderfully_ educated. So much so that he had had his processor upgraded with an archivist and linguist modules and so he could store immense quantities of data on many different languages and dialects and was a true treasure chest of information. Everything from all the legends about Primus and his first Thirteen Primes to the latest modern 'pop' culture he had witnessed before leaving Cybertron, Optimus Prime had it stored away somewhere in his processor. He wasn't a science or engineering geek and he wasn't too keen on law even if he knew the most basic ones regarding both civilians and the military, but there was a plethora of subjects he could talk about for joors on end. Megatron and their unwilling audience had the delightful experience of listening to him.

Though his passion was history, Optimus could discuss art, science, culture, literature, music, linguistics, grammer, technology, law, extraterrestrial species, astronomy, architecture, religion, politics and many other things. His original interest in history had forced him to broaden his sights when he realized how many different things he had to know about first in order to understand everything he read about. He asked questions and searched for answers until he had them. Megatron could easily see why Alpha Trion would take this young mech as an apprentice if only he were given a chance. The ancient bot had always made it clear what he thought of their useless war.

Optimus had never limited himself, which often left him open and vulnerable to the influence of others and he was not careful enough to guard himself from said influences. Otherwise, he'd really make a marvelous leader.

Not to mention he was a slagged good strategist. Megatron had never played for as long as he played with Optimus before and he was enjoying the virtual battle a bit too much. The Autobots have by now gotten used to disbelief as Optimus poured out a fourth of the information stored in the Archives all the while actively participating in the game and joking around with the Decepticon warlord. It was the most fun either of them had in far too long and they were both kind of disappointed when the results finally came out stating that, in the end, it was Optimus' victory. They had only a hundred mecha left, but Optimus had retained his flagship and two other vessels while Megatron only had his own flagship left, filled to the brim with what was left of his army. He didn't even have enough explosives left to at least blow up his opponent if he rammed into them. He regarded the grinning Prime in a way even he wasn't sure what it meant, but it didn't dampen the triumphant mech's grin.

"What, did you _really_ expect to win? I'm a _history bot_. I've studied all your strategies long enough to know what sort of strategies you might use or what sort of moves you might fall back on. I've not only studied your way of thinking, I've spent _many_ solar cycles figuring out how to counter it. I hope you've been efficiently entertained, Lord Megatron."

Red optics narrowed at the impertinent little Autobot whom he had practically overlooked until their last battle and until Shockwave informed him that, without a doubt, Optimus Prime was the mech he was looking for. The Prime in question didn't waver under his gaze, simply sitting there with a small grin still stretching full lip plates, seemingly completely oblivious to the reevaluation Megatron was preforming of him in light of the past ... entire solar cycle? Who would have thought? _I guess time really _does_ fly when you're having fun.'_

"Wow, I never thought Bossbot could act like _that_!" The yellow racer said to his fellow space bridge repair bots, who were all struggling to put this new information into the same folder as what they thought they knew of Optimus. They, too, were running reevaluations of their leader. Ultra Magnus, too, in light of finding out what had _actually_ taken place on Archa 7. Sentinel and Blackarachnia had spent enough time spitting vitriol at each other about it for the picture to be pretty clear.

Sentinel scuffed, most of the fight having gone out of him by the time the Decepticons had opened a bet pool over not only the war-sim results, but his own argument with the techno-organic that used to be Elita One and something about Megatron and Optimus, too, only on a personal level. "Oh, he used to be like this _all_ the time when war-sims were concerned. I almost forgot he had this side to him."

"He was a demon in the Academy. No one could beat him. I bet he still holds all his old records," the black, gold and purple femme said with confidence, red optics trained on her once friend sitting across from the Decepticon warlord.

"He's still holding them. Not even Rodimus Prime, the new star of the Academy, had managed to break them, though he had come close in a few," Ultra Magnus replied with a tired hum. He was an old bot. Being stuck like this wasn't good for his old frame. Maybe he should retire, if only he had someone to whom to leave his Autobots. He was contemplating just taking Optimus back before Megatron tries to seduce him to his side.

"Not the simulated combat one," Blackarachnia and Sentinel said together with absolute surety.

"No, not the simulated combat one," he agreed with a little smile. That still remained Optimus greatest Academy achievement.

"I wish I could say otherwise, but that would be too great a lie for me to tell, Optimus Prime. Though I find myself greatly resentful to leave such engaging company so soon. I have not had nearly enough time to fully enjoy your company," the warlord grinned a roguish grin when the Autobot in front of him flushed with heat at the praise. "But a deal is a deal. You and your friends are free to go. You may even take Professor Sumdac, his progeny and her AllSpark Key. I find they are not nearly as interesting as possibly an agreement for more meetings like this."

"Did Megatron just ask Optimus out on a _date_?!" An incredulous Sari whispered to her father, who had nearly fainted from relief upon hearing about his own impending freedom. Megatron ignored them all, focus trained on Optimus, waiting for his response.

"Well, I _have_ been told that I am rather _boring_, so it is quite tempting to accept the offer of a bot who thinks otherwise," he hummed and his friends all flinched at the pointed comment while Ultra Magnus and Blackarachnia frowned at them, not understanding why that particular indirect interaction had taken place. "But I'm still a loyal Autobot and we have laws against fraternizing with the enemy, so ... "

"Then become Magnus and we can negotiate a ceasefire. I can already tell you that Strika is as interested in you as I am and she'll want to pick your processor. My General of Destruction is a top notch strategist and you've exhibited both intelligence and resourcefulness. She appreciates that. Not to mention you are quite possibly the first civilianframe to bother to research the beginning of our rebellion and what led to the war in the first place. I think that for the first time in millennia, negotiating a true peace might be possible. What do you say, Autobot?" He winked at his opponent, who was gawking at him, flabbergasted. Most of the other Autobots, even Blackarachnia as a former one, were in much the same state.

"You mean to tell me you're willing to sign a peace treaty just because you're _bored_?!" An incredulous Ratchet screeched, looking from his team leader, to his Supreme Commander, who was equally flabbergasted, to the other Deceoticons who only shrugged at him in a 'What can you do' manner before looking back to the nonchalant Emperor of Destruction.

"What can I say? Bored warlords are usually not a good thing. My temper flares and I fume often. It's bad for soldiers' morale. And we're all sick and _tired_ of this war. The Decepticons only want to go back home and not be treated like weapons or tools, but like people. That, besides my boredom, should be reason enough to end this fragging war. We're not getting any younger."

"Wow," the red, blue and silver Prime breathed. "I guess I'm not _that_ boring if me entertaining the Decepticon Lord can bring about peace."

Megatron just smiled at him, stood up and offered him a hand. "You have no idea, Optimus Prime. Come, I am sure Strika wants to pick your processor about how you dismantled our greatest strategy. I am curious myself. And you can bear witness to me ordering my troops to stand down and cease hostilities. Then we can have preliminary peace talks since I'm making this peace with _you_. I'm sure you'll have the support needed to back up any f your decisions."

Optimus took his servo in a bit of a daze. "I'm going to talk with General _Strika_?! She's one of the greatest generals of all time! She orchasized twenty victories against the Quintessons that liberated Cybertron during the dark ages! The Volk have a flee on sight order if they ever come across her and her team, Team Chaar! Oh my Primus, this has to be a dream. I have so much questions I don't even know where to begin."

Megatron just grinned as he walked Optimus out of the room, leaving their comrades behind as he listened to the red and blue mech rant. Oh, yes. this was going to be fun. Optimus was entertainment for the long run, if Strika didn't steal him away from him, which he will not have happening. _He _had found Optimus first.

And if there's going to be peace anyway, he might as well make Optimus something more than a war-sim opponent.

Alliances always need to be solidified and a sparkbond will do just nice.

For now, he just enjoyed the engaging company.

**THE END**


End file.
